Death to Comic Sans

It's true: I'm a font snob. Go ahead, say it to my face. It's OK. (And I've been called far worse.) Sure, my snobbery isn't limited to typefaces alone: My snobbery extends to food (especially carrots, tomatoes, apples, bread, butter and pasta) and wine, and many other areas of life that I refuse to accept mediocrity. But fonts! They hold a special place in my heart.
 
As a proud, bonafide font snob, I judge people by the type of font they use, family members included. (Apologies in advance to any soon-to-be-relatives.) It's not that I'm all that passionate in the great serif or sans-serif debate; it's that I strongly believe the time has come for Comic Sans to die. I mean, really: For the love of god and all things holy, please, lord, make it stop.

Nobody likes a clown.
(A clown using Comic Sans, especially.)

In my ever-so-humble opinion, that font belongs in one place and one place only: elementary schools. If your audience reads at or above a sixth grade level, they should not be subjected to Comic Sans. Yet somehow, I see it everywhere. In professional e-mail signatures, community notices, business signage... it's nothing short of insane. I consider being forced to read it an insult to my intelligence. Suffice to say, I'd pull my teeth out before going to a dentist who writes his name in CS. (Would you let a third grader give you a filling? I think not.)

I'm not alone: Comic Sans Criminal is a very cute, clever and well-designed website dedicated to putting an end to the CS epidemic.

"The only appropriate uses for comic sans," it states, include "when your audience is under 11 years old (Writing to their parents in Comic Sans does not count), when you're designing a comic, [and] when your audience is dyslexic."

I admit, I probably got a little too much joy out of this cheeky little site, but it is what it is: Awesome.

So go forth and enjoy, dear readers—just please, promise me you'll never use Comic Sans ever again.